The Mom Guilt Remedy: A Simple Practice for Letting Go
The Mom Guilt Remedy: A Simple Practice for Letting Go
By Dr. Lisa Jewell — Jewell Chiropractic, Portland, OR
You’ve felt it. You’ve heard it. Let’s talk about it — and about a real remedy for it.
A Familiar Scene
Picture this: you birthed your beautiful baby three months ago. You’ve gotten the hang of your baby’s cues and are starting to see more of their personality shine through. This whole baby thing is starting to feel fun, not just a blur of sleepless nights.
Now you’re packing your bag, grabbing your coffee, and heading back to work, leaving your sweet baby behind. Maybe your body still feels a little off. Maybe you’re figuring out pumping while working. And still, you put on a happy face to step back into working life.
Pause for a second and check in with your body. What do you feel physically? What emotion feels loudest? Maybe it’s excitement about having more to your day than baby talk. Maybe it’s sheer panic at being away from your baby all day. For most moms, it’s some mix of both — and somewhere in that mix is a familiar feeling: mom guilt.
What Is Mom Guilt, Really?
Mom guilt doesn’t require going back to work to show up. A lot of moms feel like they’re never doing enough — not for their kids, their partner, their home, their job, and certainly not for themselves. If you’ve ever felt incapable of meeting the ever-rising bar of “good enough” motherhood, you are far from alone.
Why Does Mom Guilt Feel So Much Heavier Today?
It’s worth asking: did previous generations of moms feel this way too? Almost certainly, to some degree. But motherhood used to involve far fewer decisions. Kids ate what was available and affordable. They went to the school closest to home. Screen time wasn’t even a question, because the technology simply didn’t exist yet.
Here’s a piece of guilt we can put down right now: no single person can process and sort through the sheer volume of information available today on parenting, health, and wellness. That expectation isn’t fair, and it isn’t realistic — so take it off your list.
The Mom Guilt Remedy: A Self-Compassion Practice
When mom guilt starts creeping in, it isn’t always easy to recognize right away. With practice, you’ll get faster at noticing it. When you do, try this simple exercise:
- Pause. Notice where you feel the guilt in your body. Is it heaviness in your chest? A buzzing in your stomach?
- Place a hand there, if it feels right. Let that gesture say, “This is a hard emotion to feel. I’m here with you.”
- Take a few breaths, letting your hand offer comfort to that part of you.
- Choose a word or phrase that brings ease — “soften,” “I am enough,” “love” — and repeat it silently with each inhale and exhale for five breaths.
You Are Doing Better Than You Think
This simple practice can help loosen guilt’s grip and remind you of something true: you are doing an amazing job. No one can mother quite like you can. Mom guilt may keep showing up in new forms, but with this tool in your back pocket, you can meet it with compassion instead of letting it pull you under.
Ready for more support? Book an appointment to explore practical, personalized tools for navigating mom guilt and mindset shifts.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)
Q: What is mom guilt? A: Mom guilt is the persistent feeling that you’re not doing enough — for your kids, partner, home, career, or yourself. It’s extremely common and affects moms across all stages of motherhood, not just when returning to work.
Q: Is mom guilt a new phenomenon? A: While earlier generations likely experienced some version of it, today’s moms face far more decisions — around parenting styles, screen time, nutrition, and information overload — which can intensify feelings of guilt.
Q: What is the mom guilt remedy exercise? A: It’s a short self-compassion practice: pause and notice where guilt shows up in your body, place a hand there, breathe, and repeat a calming word or phrase like “I am enough” for five breaths.
Q: How can I recognize mom guilt before it takes over? A: Mom guilt can be subtle at first. With practice, tuning into physical sensations — like tightness in the chest or a knot in the stomach — can help you notice and name the feeling sooner.
Q: Does mom guilt ever fully go away? A: For most moms, guilt resurfaces in new forms as circumstances change. The goal isn’t to eliminate it entirely, but to build tools — like the self-compassion practice above — to work with it rather than be overwhelmed by it.
Q: Where can I learn more strategies for managing mom guilt? A: The Unstoppable Mom Ebook offers additional practices and mindset tools specifically designed to help moms navigate guilt and self-doubt.
Join Our Online Community: The Unstoppable Mom
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As a member, you’ll enjoy:
- Real conversations around pregnancy, postpartum, and parenting
- Expert interviews and education from trusted providers
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This is more than just a group — it’s your village.
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